Putting the 'Pieces' Together...

It's been a long time since I've posted anything new on our blog. I wish that I could tell you that a lot has happened since the last time I posted, but unfortunately everything has been put on hold.

Legally in the eyes of the Congolese government, Asher is our son. We've followed all of the "rules", filled out the numerous amount of paperwork, paid our "fees"... We've held up our part of the bargain, but the immigration department in the Congo has "temporarily" put a hold on issuing exit letters for any adopted children to leave the country. This suspension could last through this Sept/Oct or maybe even longer. Or it could change by next month. We just don't know. We're in limbo. We're waiting.

Jim and I have been very blessed to have had all of the funds we've needed to pay all of our adoption fees. We have not had to do much fundraising up to this point. However, we know that we will need at least $10,000 for travel expenses when we do finally travel to get our son. That is for airfare, hotel, and living expenses in Congo, which could be up to 3 weeks (or longer). There are many different fundraising ideas that I have come across during our adoption process, but this one touched me the most. I love the idea of having something tangible that our son can look at and keep with him forever...

Puzzle Fundraiser

We would like you to be a 'piece' of Asher's story. This little boy has so little and we would like to give him as many memories as we can.

Jim and I have purchased a 500 piece puzzle. 

You can sponsor a piece for $10 and we'll write your name on the back.

You may sponsor as many pieces as you'd like.

One for every person in your family, if you want.

Or perhaps a single piece in memory of somebody special.

Or perhaps just one for you.

You could even pool your resources with a friend and purchase a piece together.

Whatever works for you.

Once the puzzle is complete, and all 500 pieces are sponsored, we will frame the puzzle in double-sided glass and hang it in Asher's room.

Please pray about this and share with your family and friends if you can. The more people that know about this and are willing to help us, the closer we will be to our goal.

And one day, I'll be able to take that picture down, have Asher snuggle up on my lap, and we'll turn it over and I will point to all of the puzzle pieces and tell him, "Look how much you were loved. Look at how much you were wanted. Look at all these people who helped bring you home."

So here's what you need to do:

-Click the 'Donate' tab on the right side of your screen.
-Pick the amount that  you would like to donate. We are asking $10/puzzle piece.
-Sponsor as many pieces as you would like.
-You can also send us a personal check or cash in person if you would like. (If you need our address, please email at: jimwarne@hotmail.com)
-I will periodically update the progress of the puzzle with pictures and I will post updates on Facebook as well.

Thank you!!!

Hanging on...

It's amazing how many emotions a person can go through in a matter of weeks, days, hours, and sometimes even minutes. A few weeks ago, I posted that there was a small chance that we could be getting our little boy later this summer. Since that post, my hope that this will happen is pretty much zero. Two weeks ago, Jim and I were given a very difficult decision: we had to decide to file our immigration paperwork in the US and hope it would get approved or we could fly to Congo and file our paperwork in person. If we had decided to go to Africa, we would have had to quickly get a yellow fever vaccine (and a note from our doctor stating that it didn't need to be in full affect for us to enter the country) and purchase plane tickets--all in a matter of 5-6 days. If we had traveled, we may have been able to see our little man for a few days (I say may have because he is still in the orphanage several miles from the capital city-I hope our agency would have tried to get him to the capital if we had decided to travel). I would have loved to have held him and kissed his little cheeks! But leaving him would have been one of the hardest things I've ever done...and all of this would not have guaranteed being able to bring him home in a few months.

Anyway, we chose not to go through all of this and to send our paperwork overnight to the US office. I still feel like that is what was best for us. We placed it in God's hands and chose not to spend a few days in significant stress. Since this decision, we have basically heard from our agency that there is no chance of his case being investigated this month, which means we have no idea when they will go back to his region. I have been plagued with guilt the past few days, feeling as though I have failed this little boy. I feel like I should have done whatever I could to bring him home. Now he's stuck.

What makes me the most upset is the fact that it is our wonderful US government that is preventing him from coming home to us. He is legally ours in the eyes of the Congo. I understand why the US is conducting investigations, but it doesn't comfort me as this little guy's mom. I feel the best and safest place for him right now, is here with us. Not waiting 3, 6, or even 9 more months because the US can't handle the investigations with their current staff in the Congo.

So what do we do now? I know that I can't just sit here and be mad or depressed (even though I will likely go through these emotions several times a day.) I've decided I need to focus on a few things here in the States. I'm planning on training for 3 half marathons that are about 5 weeks apart: the Leading Ladies Half in Spearfish, SD and the Billings and Bismarck half marathons. Jim will be doing the Billings and Bismarck half as well. This may not bring our little guy home any sooner, but it will be a healthy outlet for our stress.

The other thing that we need to do is begin some fundraising. We have been very blessed up to this point and our adoption is almost 100% funded. However, our travel expenses are not. We will likely need at least $10,000 for travel. This includes our flight, hotel, and cash to live on for 2-3 weeks while we are there.

For fundraising I'm going to start by adding a tab off to the right side of this blog that links to Just Love Coffee. Just Love Coffee is based out of TN and roast fair trade, organic coffee. A portion of their proceeds go directly to helping those that need it. We will receive anything that is purchased from them through the link on our blog (from about $3-$19 depending on what is purchased). This is a small way for us to start fundraising for some travel expenses.

We have a few other fundraising ideas that we will begin focusing on and we will let you know what they are as we go.

We know there are a lot of you out there who are praying for us and this amazing little boy and we want to say 'thank you'. Without your support, we wouldn't be able to get through this crazy, exhausting, amazing journey.

I'm not sure when/if I will be posting a picture of our little guy on this blog (for privacy reasons), but I will share the name that we will be giving him when he gets home. We have decided on Asher, which means: 'fortunate, blessed, happy one' in Hebrew.

Progress

Every time that I begin to doubt God's hand in this adoption, He just has to show me how big he really is.

"I am the Lord, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me?"

Jer. 32:27

Our adoption process has been moving along as expected...slowly and unpredictably. We still do not know for sure when we will be bringing our little man home. After we received our referral, I was hoping that we would be able to go and get him before Christmas. Since our referral, my hopes of that happening have been fading and I've begun to think it will be more like Feb. or March.
But then last week, all of that changed. We might, MIGHT be going to get him in Sept. or Oct!! I'm not counting on this, but there's a chance!

This week, we got news (and when I say news, I mean a bill) that our little guy will be moved from the orphanage in Mbuji Mayi to our adoption agency's transition home in the capital city, Kinshasa. This is almost a 600 mile journey! This is a huge step, because he will now receive a little better care and will be with staff that have been trained by our adoption agency. He will have running water and electricity. From what we have been told, the orphanage that he was at is actually pretty good and that he was fed 3 times every day. Still, it is nice to know that he is being moved. When we go to pick him up, we will go to this transition home briefly and be able to see where he lived. I pray that this transition is not too hard on him. All he has known for the past few months has been the orphanage, so this will be very different for him.

When we first began this journey, I don't think that I realized how many highs and lows and how much uncertainty there is in the adoption process. I wouldn't change this experience for anything, but it has definitely made me trust God more than I did before. I know that our little man is worth every tear I've shed and every worry I have. I have to trust that God has this whole thing in control and whether we go and get him this fall or have to wait a few more months, God knows when he should come home to us.

Erin

It's a....

BOY!

We received our referral early last week (I know, I should have posted this sooner). We got a referral for a 7 month old little boy in DR Congo. I wish I could post pictures! He has the sweetest, cutest face! He looks very healthy and happy-which is a huge praise! We received new pictures today and he has already changed so much! I can't post a picture or name at this time, for privacy and legal reasons, but for now we will refer to him as A.

We should be able to send him care packages very soon! (We might be able to do it already). I can't wait to go shopping for him! Jim and I are going to hit a few stores this weekend. I didn't realize until we received our referral, that there is so much LESS boy stuff than girls.

Now we just wait. We have to wait for all the legal stuff to go through, and to be honest, I'm not sure what what all that entails. It will probably be 8-12 months before we go to Africa to get him. I'm praying that we can go before Christmas. Until that time, we should receive monthly updates and photos-it will be so hard watching him grow up in photos. We also have to fill out forms for grants and begin some fund raising.

I would like to ask you all to pray for us and that precious little boy. I will give you more details as I'm able to.

Erin

Waiting...

I've been putting off updating our blog because I was hoping to have more news. Jim and I are patiently waiting to receive our referral. For those of you who aren't familiar with the adoption process, a referral is a picture and brief summary of a child that best matches our needs. We then have the choice to either accept the referral or wait for another one. After speaking with our case manager, it looks like our adoption agency is trying to match us with a baby (boy or girl) that is 5-6 months old or less. Our agency would like the adopted child to be younger than Jade. I spoke with our case manager about a week ago, and she told me that we should have our referral in 1-2 weeks. The referral will come to us via e-mail. Needless to say, since then I have been checking my e-mail about every 10 min. I am really hoping that the next post that I write will be telling you all about our referral.

I am very anxious to receive our referral, but God has given me a peace that has kept me grounded. I had this same peace when I was pregnant with Jade. I just knew that God had this situation in control and I just needed to yield to Him. At the time we lost our little girl Abby, I never thought that I would be able to endure another pregnancy without significant fear, but God has given me the faith to trust Him because I know that I am not in control.

"Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see." Hebrews 11:1

Plans Change

Wouldn't it be something if our plans and God's plans always lined up? Wouldn't it be nice if we were always patient and allowed God to reveal His plans to us in His timing? I've been finding this very hard the past few weeks/months. I want to know where 2013 is leading us and how it is going to end up. I have my ideas of what I want to happen, but I'm struggling with being patient and allowing God to do His thing.

The adoption process has been so much more emotional than I ever thought it would be. I thought it was just about signing a few papers, waiting to be matched with a child, and then preparing to bring that child home. But since we've begun the process, I've realized that it is MUCH more than that. It is a process of waiting, hoping, and praying. I didn't realize how much I would begin to care for a child that I have never met and who is not my own. I want so badly to meet this child and see his or her face that I sometimes lie awake at night and worry for them. I know that God has this situation under control and that He will protect that child more than I ever could, but I still want to be in control of the situation.

God has taught me a lot about control over the past few years. I've learned...I have none. He is in complete control of my life and if I would just turn the wheel over to Him, I would end up at the right destination. Looking back, this is not where I thought I would be in life. Four years ago, I thought we would begin to have the family that Jim and I had always planned for. We wanted to have children, but adopting wasn't really even on our radar. We went through a very difficult time when we lost our daughter Abby. However, it was during this time that God allowed my heart to be more open to adoption. I knew that if we couldn't have our own children then we would adopt (but at that time it probably would have been an infant from the U.S.). Then God allowed us to have our beautiful and precious daughter, Jade. After she was born, we began thinking about when we might want to try for another child. My idea was to wait until Jade was about a year old. Well, God had other plans. When Jade was about 3 months old, I began feeling that adoption was the next step. Then we felt Him pulling us toward international adoption. Wait a minute Lord!?? Are you sure? That was my initial reaction. Why is it that we always have to question Him?

Everyday I wonder if I'm cut out for this. I wonder if I'll be able to care for a child that has been through more than I will ever know.  I doubt myself and my abilities everyday. But then I hear a little voice that tells me "I've got this. You can do this with Me," and I know that God is in control and that He will help me through this even if I make mistakes (which I will).

I really don't know where I was going with this post, but I just needed to get a few thoughts out of my head. I'm sorry if this has left any of you confused, but just know that God wants to be in control of your life and if you would let Him, He has amazing plans for you that you can only dream of.

"For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways, declares the Lord" 

Isaiah 55:8

Paperwork...

For anyone who has gone through the adoption process, you understand all of the paperwork that comes along with it. I thought we had a lot of paperwork to do just for applying for our home study and adoption agency. Well, now our home study is finished and approved and we are officially under contract with our adoption agency. The next step is compiling all the paperwork needed for our dossier. We need certified birth certificates, wedding certificate, notarized letters from our employers and doctors, a notarized letter from the sheriff's office, passports, etc...and a few other items. After we collect all of the required documents, we have to take them to the capital and have every item state certified. Then, and only then, will our dossier be complete and legal. Oh, and did I mention that we have to scrutinize every notary's signature to make sure it's signed correctly and that their commission doesn't expire before June 2014 (in case our adoption is held up). We've each had to request the doctor's office to redo their letter to make sure it's "correct". I'm sure they love us :)

And if this paperwork isn't enough, we are also beginning to look at grants (because adoptions, whether international or domestic, are expensive). Every grant issuer has their own paperwork requirements. Some of them have similar requirements, but they all seem to be slightly different. I'm trying to keep all of this stuff straight, but I'm not gonna lie, I am getting a little overcome with stress and emotions. It's during this time, that I just have to close my eyes and say, "Lord Jesus, please be with me as we go on this roller coaster ride. I need to feel Your presence and sense of peace." And I always seem to compose myself and feel Him with me. Jim and I have been through quite a ride since we've been married, but the Lord has gotten us through everyday and I will continue to follow Him where ever He leads us.

We are also in a very exciting, terrifying, ... time in our adoption journey. Any day now, we could receive a referral for a child from our adoption agency. What does that mean, you ask? That means we will be emailed 1-2 photos and a BRIEF explanation of the child (medical history, reason for abandonment, etc). We both are ready for a face and a name! Unfortunately, I think things will become even harder when we do have that face and name. We will want more than anything to have that child home with us and safe.

We'll keep you posted and hopefully soon we'll be able to let you all know about that precious child that is waiting for us!

Erin & Jim

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas from our family to yours!

We are hoping and praying that these little shoes will be filled by next Christmas...

Isaiah 7:14 "Therefore the Lord himself will give you a sign: The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel." 

Why Congo?

I'm often asked why we have chosen to adopt a child from the Democratic Republic of the Congo (DRC). And to be truly honest, all I can say is that this is where we have felt God calling us to adopt. I hadn't even heard of the DRC until a few months ago, when I found out a friend from high school was adopting from there. Since then, we have done a lot of research about the country and believe that this is where our little one will be or is waiting for us.


The DRC is the second largest country in Africa. It's population is about 73 million people. The official language is French. The Second Congo War has been going on since 1998 and over 5 million people have died. The prevalence of rape and other sexual violence has been described as some of the worst in the world. The DRC has the second-highest rate of infant mortality in the world.

I know that there are children in other counties (even here in the United States) that need caring homes, but after learning about this country, we just feel led to get a child out of there as soon as we can. The future of a child living in the DRC isn't good. There is very little hope there and if we can offer a little hope to one innocent child, why wouldn't we?

We are currently patiently waiting for our homestudy to be completed so we can submit it to our adoption agency in Denver. We are hoping to get our dossier information started this week as well. I haven't been able to get in contact with our adoption agency in the past week, so I really don't know where we stand. For those of you who don't know what a dossier is, here is the definition from Wikipedia: A dossier is a collection of papers or other sources, containing detailed information about a particular person or subject, together with a synopsis of their content. This information gets sent to DRC and then hopefully we will receive a referral of a child. We have specified that we would like a child between the ages of 6-18 months of either gender.

I have been thinking and praying a lot recently of our adopted child. Here is a little note from me to them.

Dear Little One,

I think about you daily and wonder what you look like. My heart aches for you even though I've never met you and you may not even be born yet. I pray that God will keep you safe until your daddy and I can come and rescue you. There is no greater place to be than under the protection of our Lord and Savior. So during this time, I must trust that He will protect you and bring me peace until you are in my arms.

Love,
Mommy

"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." James 1:27

Beginning Our Adoption Journey

This is what Jim and I have been staring at for the past few weeks. This is the paperwork for our adoption applications--just the applications!

For those of you who had no idea that Jim and I were considering adoption, well, we are :)
For some time now, we have felt God's calling on our lives to adopt. I think we both thought it would be a little later in life after we were done having children of our own. However, our plans are certainly not God's plans and we both feel that he is urging us to pursue adoption at this time. We have decided to adopt internationally from the Democratic Republic of the Congo in Africa. After prayerfully considering other countries, we both feel a calling to this country. It is a country with very few resources and the children are living in very poor conditions. Many of them have malaria and parasites because of the lack of medical treatment. Jim and I feel that God has provided us with so much, that we need to help a child who has very little.

We have started our home study process. For those of you who don't know much about the adoption process, the home study is the first part that needs to be completed in the adoption process. We have to meet with the social worker 3 times and she asks a lot of questions about us. We also have to have physicals done, fingerprints taken, and give them all our financial information for the past few years. It seems daunting, but I am just trying to stay focused on why we are doing this.

I'll try and post when I can to keep everyone informed. Right now, Jim and I just ask for prayers as we step out on this journey. We know that God is in control of this and guiding us as we go along.

Here's our current family...it will be exciting to see what it looks like a year or two from now :)

Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

James 1:27

Life

I'm not even going to begin trying to catch up for the past 6-7 months! I have been a horrible blogger for all of our friends and family. So instead of trying to play "catch up", I'm just going to start with what's going on in the Warne household now...

Jade turned 11 months old last week! I can't believe she's almost a year old. That means I have to get serious about planning her first birthday.

I have had so much fun being a mom. It is the most exhausting, exhilirating, emotional roller coaster that one will ever be on, but one that I would never give up. Jade is crawling and pulling herself up, which means she's getting into EVERYTHING and she's not happy when mommy takes stuff away. She is talking a little and can say 'dada' and 'uh-oh' and she "roars" when we point to a green dinosaur in one of her books. She loves to be with mommy and likes to help in the kitchen. She enjoys jogging in her BOB jogging stroller and likes to be outside anytime. It's so much fun watching her learn new things everyday.

In other news, for those of you who may not know...Jim and I are in the process of adopting. I will post more on this later this week.

Catching Up

Well, a lot of time has passed since my last posting. Jade has turned 3 months old, went on her first major trip, started daycare, and turned 4 months old! We have been having so much fun with her! She is getting so big and she is interacting with us more and more every day.

Jade turned 3 months old on Jan. 6th.

In the middle of Jan. we headed south to visit our amazing friends in Arizona! Of course it nice to go to AZ in Jan and the weather was wonderful, but we really just wanted to see all of our friends. They made us feel so welcome. It was as if we hadn't left. Two of my best friends in AZ had little girls around the same time Jade was born. It was nice to meet their little girls.

Jade did great on the plane!!

                                           

Here's Jade and Kinley. Kinley is 1 week younger than Jade and she was born 4 weeks early, but she has more than made up for it :)

Here is JoAnne and Lucy--Beautiful girls! Lucy is about 3 weeks older than Jade.

Mike and Diane...they were our neighbors. It was so nice to see them!

Here are Chris and Jim with the girls: Kinley, Harper, and Jade

This is Dana and I. Dana and her husband Brian allowed us to crash with them for a week.

And here's the Holohan family: Harper, Rachel, Kinley, and Chris. This picture pretty much sums them up. And we love them!

Our time in AZ was great and Jim and I both have hopes of maybe moving back someday...

Jade turned 4 months old on Feb. 6th. Taking pictures was a lot more challenging because she wouldn't sit still.
Here stats were:
14 lb 5oz
24 1/4 in

So that has been the past few months in a nutshell.
Now for today...Jim and I have been busy in the kitchen. Here's what we made today.

Honey Oatmeal Bread

Homemade Almond Butter

Granola

And Caramelized Onion and Italian Sausage Pizza (our own recipe)

Needless to say, we are eating very good today:)

Hope everyone is having a blessed day.

It's been a while

It's been a while since I actually posted anything. I hope that everyone had a nice Christmas. We enjoyed Christmas with Jim's mom, sister, and brother-in-law. It was so nice to spend our first Christmas with Jade. We feel so blessed that God has given us such a wonderful little girl--everyday I am amazed at how exciting and challenging being a mother is.

Jade is growing up fast. She has started "talking" a lot and she has discovered her hands. She is also rolling to her side. Yesterday she started hitting a toy with her left hand--purposefully!! It is so amazing to watch her grow up!

                                                    Christmas 2011

                                                    Jade got a lot of nice presents

                                                    Christmas jammies

                        Family Christmas photo--you can see our picture with Abby in the back

2 Months!

Two Years...

Two Years...

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11



It does not seem like it's been 2 years since our little girl, Abby, went to be with the Lord. A lot has happened in those 2 years and I am so thankful that God is so faithful, despite the fact that I doubt Him-a lot.

I know for a fact that God had us go through losing Abby in the right place/time. He provided us with so much love and support from our church and our close friends while we were there. I feel so blessed to have had the support we did. I never felt as though we were alone. I always had a friend to talk to and cry with (thanks JoAnne and Rachel). It also helped knowing that all of our friends were believers and even though they couldn't explain why God would choose us to go through this journey, they could reassure us that Abby would soon be able to meet Jesus and live a wonderful life in the most perfect place there is. And even though I selfishly wish that she was with us today and I could hold her in my arms, I am comforted by the fact that Jesus has been able to hold her for me. She was always His and not mine.

God has challenged us greatly and I have to say, I don't feel as though I have trusted in Him like I should.  The day we found out we would be having another baby was the best and scariest day of my life. I knew that I had to put all of my faith in the Lord and allow him to carry me through.  After what we went through with Abby, it was the only way that I could get through the pregnancy without being terrified. God was faithful, and brought so much peace throughout the pregnancy. I would have moments where I would become overwhelmed and afraid that the same thing was going to happen, but God provided me with a sense that things were going to be different this time. I could honestly hear Him whisper in my ear, "It's going to be ok. Trust me."

We are so blessed to have another little girl. I can't help but look at this picture and wish that we had another little girl in it with us. She will always be in our hearts and we will never forget her. Thanks to all of our friends and family that supported us through that difficult time.

I'm going to end this post with the words from the Selah song "I Will Carry You". It perfectly describes how I felt going through the loss of Abigail. Here is a link if you would like to listen to it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VLuaGiu73jc&noredirect=1



I Will Carry YouThere were photographs I wanted to take
Things I wanted to show you
Sing sweet lullabies, wipe your teary eyes
Who could love you like this?People say that I am brave but i'm not
Truth is i'm barely hanging on
But there's a greater story
Written long before me
Because He loves you like this
So I will carry you
While your heart beats here
Long beyond the empty cradle
Through the coming years
I will carry you
All my life
And I will praise the One who's chosen me
To carry you

Such a short time
Such a long road
All this madness
But I know
That the silence
Has brought me to His voice
And He says

I've shown her photographs of time beginning
Walked her through the parted seas
Angel lullabies, no more teary eyes
Who could love her like this?

I will carry you
While your heart beats here
Long beyond the empty cradle
Through the coming years
I will carry you
All your life
And I will praise the One who's chosen me
To carry you